free hit counter Snacks, please!: Dear Senator Dodd

Wednesday, May 30, 2007

Dear Senator Dodd

This is the letter that I'm mailing to Chris Dodd today. I really hope he writes back. I think it would be a great joke!! Maybe better than the Major League Baseball hoax that David and I pulled on my father (and that was a really good one... he thought for sure he was going to be sent to Gitmo for stalking Frank Robinson.) Anyway, if he plays along, he'll certainly get my vote in 2008.

Dear Senator Dodd:

I know you get a lot of strange requests from constituents. I think I will shortly earn dubious recognition among them…
I am writing in the hopes that you can help me play a joke on my father. His name is John F-. Back in the day, he used to own the Maple Café in the South End of Hartford and you campaigned there a few times. I know this is true (and not a whole lot of bar talk) because he has a framed photograph of the two of you in his East Hartford basement. Also, I’m pretty sure he was friendly with Ed Mann, your Connecticut state director, but I couldn’t say whether he’d remember Dad. (I think he’s pretty memorable, but I’m biased.)
Anyway, he’s kind of a practical joker himself. (Among his greatest hits: Writing a fake welcome letter to my 10-year-old nephew from a bogus Cape Cod nudist colony. “Bring a towel. For sitting on only!” Poor nephew started to cry…) But it’s time to turn the tables. He’s getting old and needs a little spark in his life.
So, do you think you could write him a letter (on official letterhead, of course!) inviting him to take an active role in your Presidential campaign? Perhaps you could remember his Irish charm, so frequently on display at the Maple, and suggest he travel with you to events and fundraisers across the country, where his special touch could be employed to woo lady voters of a certain age… You might wonder if his wife will allow it. (She most certainly would not.)
Oh, it would be such a good joke!!!
Like I said, I know this is a strange one. But I am completely serious. I think it would be hysterical. Whether you want to tell him it’s a joke in the letter is completely up to you.
In any case, regardless of your participation in my schemes, I wish you the best with your Presidential campaign. My father, my mother, my sisters, brother and I, not to mention aunts, uncles and cousins, always have voted for you, whenever we’ve had the opportunity, and you can count on our support in 2008. (I do have a brother-in-law who might be a Republican, but he knows better than to admit it.) If we can assist you in any other way, please let me know.
Thanks for your help!


Anonymous Cynthia said...

Once again, I become convinced that due to our friendship I'll be staring down the wrong end of a federal subpoena some day...sigh....

May 30, 2007 at 8:35 AM  
Anonymous Pamela said...

I agree with Cynthia! Should I mention the trouble I got into with TSA over the weekend because of the contraband Burt's Bees lavendar spray you gave me?

May 31, 2007 at 11:16 AM  
Blogger Mary Ellen said...

Ha. You both are nuts.
I served on a federal grand jury for two years! The system owes me. And don't talk to Cynthia about TSA. They took her lemon curd!

May 31, 2007 at 1:19 PM  

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