free hit counter Snacks, please!: A note from management

Wednesday, August 20, 2008

A note from management

Dear Workers,

I'm the new boss. You can call me Dr. Lucy.

You all are very nice! Thank you for showing me pictures of your dogs and babies. Together I know we can accomplish great things! But first I would like to make a few changes.

1) Yesterday's staff meeting was a lot of fun. I really liked it when I made a yellow Play-Doh snake and then crushed it under a red smelly marker. From now on, everybody must come to staff meetings with their own tubs of Play-Doh and at least one smelly marker. We will all make snakes! We will name them after the old bosses! And then we will smoosh them!

2) Let's talk to the tech guys about switching our home page. I want everybody to be able to play that Elmo game, the one where he says, "Elmo has to use the potty!" And then you get to send him to the potty by pressing any key on the keyboard. (Which one is the any key? Which? Which???! No! You are not listening to me! Which one is the ANY key??? Okay, Mommy says it is L.)

3) More candy machines! And mandatory nap time for all. Mommy says we get smarter while we sleep. This will be useful, right? Let's make sure that guy over there, the one who doesn't understand why Mommy needs another four weeks of vacation this year, gets put to sleep for a loooong time.

4) I understand you all write stuff? For some kind of magazine? No more writing. Not everybody can read! From now on, all these "words" will be replaced with Highlights-style hidden picture games. And then we can use the smelly markers again!

Okay, that's it for now! Time for lunch!


Anonymous Cynthia said...

I've been gone for less than a week and there's already a kindygartener running things.

August 20, 2008 at 3:50 PM  

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